No, I Did Not Make Any Resolutions.

Here it is, the new year. So full of hope and -- well, just hope. Last year was a struggle so I'm hoping (there's that word again) that this year will bring better things and more stability. Seeing as how the bf has no job and I'm hoping to go back to school in the fall, I don't see the stability in my future but let's just HOPE for the best. :)

On to resolutions. I haven't made any but I'm definitely being asked about them often enough. I hate resolutions. "Go to the gym at least 3 times a week, read a book a month (I already do that one but I'm just using examples here), lose 10 pounds, go to church more, etc..." These are all recipes for disaster, in my book. I am the kind of person that a) can get very down on herself if given the fodder, and b) believes in a life without too many straight paths.

Let's look at "a". There is no better fuel for a debbie downer moment than realizing that it's October and I haven't really kept up with any of my resolutions. I figure if you're a positive person you can find a way to rationalize to yourself why you haven't accomplished your goals or you might just take that measly attempt to hit the gym back in the first quarter of the year as a "good enough effort". I mean, at least you tried, right? I'm not like that. I try not to delude myself. I look at the failure as yet another thing that I can't seem to do to completion. I don't need that kind of letdown in my life. I will not set myself up for disappointment.

As for "b", I imagine people are thinking that maybe this is an excuse for not making goals in life and accomplishing things. Maybe you're right but I think there's a lot more to it. Life can be very adventurous and can bring you completely unexpected turns. I find a lot more joy in just surfing the wave of life instead of pre-planning the itinerary before I've gotten there. This isn't the way a lot of people live their lives but I find a lot more peace in just letting things happen as they will. Now don't take me for a complete bum. I do take steps towards the things I need to accomplish but I do these in my own time and not necessarily once a year with a 364 day deadline looming above me.

So it's about hope and surfing the wave of life, huh? Okay then. I'm going to HOPE that 2010 brings a lot of positive things my way and that it doesn't throw as many crazy obstacles my way.

(i.e. I'd better catch a great big wave this year.)